ohhh, i shouldda been a cowboy

Wed, 30 Aug 2006 03:31:01 GMT

yes, i have the old life. but yes, i'm finding a more passionate and devote one. and yes, i think i like it.

Wed, 09 Aug 2006 12:18:51 GMT

and in Him we pray and put our faith.

what more can we do in this war-filled world?

Fri, 04 Aug 2006 02:27:08 GMT

somedays, i just don't know how to handle it.

-living alone
-getting ready for college alone
-shopping alone
-cleaning alone
-driving alone
-being alone

where's the guidance that everyone else seems to be getting as we all venture off to the next part of our lives? i can't do this on my own.

Exodus 18:17-19

mixed-up kinda day

Sun, 08 Jan 2006 15:29:49 GMT

this life is starting to get ridiculous...yesterday our tournament started off badly, but then improved as we competed with lahser and lost, but we played our butts off for a while, that's for sure. anyways, last night sucked more than the morning of losing--i went to visit an old friend at her house party, when the cops showed up and wanted to tow my car...first of all, i don't know why i get myself into these situations, and second of all, i don't know why i even thought for one second that things would be the same...

well, they're not. that's for sure. she's got a 22 year old boyfriend (fine, whatever, but he's pretty white-trash) and she's got 6 other roommates in this house, all who are over 20. it just seems a bit weird to me that she turned out like this--partying and such all the time, and then the party gets so big that the cops have to show up....yea, that's real cool. i wish i wouldn't have gone so i would still have that middle-school best friend image of her. but i guess things really do change, whether we'd like to accept it or not.

on a lighter note, my day did have its perks. i saw so many people that i love and miss a lot at the tournament today (WLN vballas, mrs. essian mostly, but also mrs. krane and all the old coaches...renee. jess. murr. kelsey and katie.) it's good to see people who actually know you, and i miss that this year about coaching/our team. i feel like we aren't very personal with our coach, and i love that relationship i've had on other teams...but once again...each team is different, and you can't expect the same thing out of them all or you'll constantly be disappointed.

yea, and my individual entries AND my portfolio got gold keys in Scholastics...meaning that they will now go on to regionals in New York. if they win from there, they go on to DC, which would be amazing, but i'm just happy they got this far!!!

and congrats to kelly hurd, adrian f. (lol), kalie strzelecki on their portfolio and individual keys. and steph--way to go on "her window".

<3

Tue, 03 Jan 2006 03:42:26 GMT

i can't believe i've crossed over, but these past few days have been hell and i needed a fresh start...thus the absense of livejournal and the introduction to myspace

for some reason i dont think this is going to fulfill my needs...

Mon, 26 Dec 2005 01:08:22 GMT

it's sad when i can't even spend christmas with my favorite person. he's all alone at home and there's nothing that i can do about it...as they say i have to "roll with the punches". i hate that saying and i don't want things to be this way.

**side note**
birthday celebration for me, nicole, and rachel on the night of the 29th. we're dressing up (that means skirts or short dresses; nice shirts and pants for you boys) and going out to eat at the bamboo club. anyone can join us if they'd like, just let me or rach or nicole know as soon as possible.

yay christmas eve.

Sun, 25 Dec 2005 01:57:50 GMT

well it started out alright...and then someone came up with the brilliant idea of going out to dinner as a "family". nick left first and then dad, so there i was with the devil herself who says that nothing is her fault.

when is this all going to just be over? happy holidays.

Sat, 24 Dec 2005 04:56:09 GMT

Finnnnn: its grayt

way to sound it out kel. just thought i'd update this...you won't remember this in the morning, but good job. love you girl!

shopped today (mall=insane). visited with LC and her madre. dinner with seanty and shane and chelsea. the notebook with dad. wrapped presents. tomorrow should be fun i hope...choir and midnight mass. yay! merry christmas everyone. spread the joy!

Mon, 19 Dec 2005 00:57:04 GMT

my mind has just been all over the place this weekend...so much is changing, not only my age, but everthing else. and i just can't handle this anymore. it's been going on for so long and i'm broken. i'm just ready to crash and burn and sign out for the time present. it's just, who does a girl go to when God takes so long to respond and my own thoughts are driving me crazy? absolutely. i feel like i belong in some other place or that i need to take a week or two off to just go. i need to just leave here...this house this town this life. just for a little while. my head is getting too full of ideas and opinions and words that i don't allow myself to express and i can't help myself. i've never been taught how to portray feelings and it's not something i can teach myself. where do i go from here? i'm so trapped.

God, I surrender.

Fri, 16 Dec 2005 01:44:28 GMT

temptations all around me.
and i give in.
challenges keep coming.

when will i triumph over them

these days...

Thu, 15 Dec 2005 04:12:26 GMT

Because of the service by which you have proved yourselves, men will praise God for the obedience that accompanies your confession of the gospel of Christ, and for your generosity in sharing with them and with everyone else.
-2 Corinthians 9:13

Wed, 14 Dec 2005 03:01:23 GMT

i need some help

Mon, 12 Dec 2005 03:03:49 GMT

let us walk by the same rule,
let us mind the same thing.

-proverbs 3:16

smile like you mean it. i do.

Sat, 10 Dec 2005 19:06:41 GMT

forgot to mention in the last post that i now have the option of being a wolverine.

Sat, 10 Dec 2005 04:04:50 GMT

well that was fun.

Thu, 08 Dec 2005 03:51:52 GMT

ap english discussion really got me thinking...and i hope others can open their minds a bit. this will be good. still contemplating

uh ohhh...

Wed, 07 Dec 2005 02:25:24 GMT

and the rib, which the Lord God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man.
-Genesis 2:22

and it's cool now. i don't feel like going home now.

Mon, 05 Dec 2005 23:51:23 GMT

tomato basil soup. sweatpants. fireside. hope.

Sat, 03 Dec 2005 16:41:07 GMT

well work was alright last night...other than the fact that we were late b/c we were locked out of alyssa's house. i love that girl so much!

yea we're going to go to london this summer together. planning spring break details today with ren, hopefully that goes well...hanging out with alyssa later and then working...ohh pinewood

one of my favorites...a bit of sarcasm however.

Wed, 30 Nov 2005 02:27:37 GMT

i don't know how.

seeing then that we have such hope, we use great plainness of speech.
-II Corinthians 3:12

g'bye Dad

Sun, 27 Nov 2005 03:02:55 GMT

Then Jonathon said to David, Tomorrow is the new moon: and thou shalt be missed, because thy seat will be empty.
-I Samuel 20:18

yay

Tue, 22 Nov 2005 01:26:10 GMT

>>>>>>a new quote that i'm going to post somewhere in the art room<<<<<<<

"the creation of something new is not accomplished by the intellect but by the play instinct acting from inner necessity. the creative mind plays with the objects it loves."
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
-some random guy who's last name is Jung.

today was interesting, let's just say. good luck on the beloved/little foxes test to anyone in 3rd hour TC....maybe i'm crazy but i thought it was really hard. i prolly failed since i didn't even write one and a half essays. gahh (anyone else notice that that's my new favorite word?)

two more days and no more tests...speaking of school, malott mentioned rateyourteacher.com today in class, so i checked it out and it's pretty funny. just something to read when you're bored over this break...soon and very soon.

the glory

Mon, 21 Nov 2005 00:27:39 GMT

it's been a fun fun weekend...annnnd--one of my poems is going to be ~~published!~~ ;)

shaded.

That's the girl. the one.
whose thoughts dash in.
and out.
of doors and windows
as lightning
strikes. her world-
her ideas-
and thunder interrupts
with sounds of
dropping
books and crashing cars-
traffic is a wreck.
in this world. the one
of habits and routines
standard
to dull pencils that
won't express
words they mean to say.
Red does not persist
up there-
stopping
dangerous love
from romancing to devilish means.
Rather
green of jealousy
not lust or luck.
yellow that blinds
not joys.
orange of caution
not fruitfulness.
blue of veins--complex highways
making survival.
an allowance.
not calming skies.
Buildings and Bridges
don't permit passing-
just stopping-
and staring-
in Their reflections.

Tue, 15 Nov 2005 04:47:28 GMT

my lips shall not speak falsehood,
nor my tongue utter deceit!
-Job 27:4

Mon, 14 Nov 2005 03:26:50 GMT

We just shake hands at meeting
With many that come nigh
We nod the head in greeting
To many that go by-

But welcome through the gateway
Our few old friends and true;
Then hearts leap up, and straightway
There's open house for you,
Old friends,
There's open house for you.